LockDown Browser

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First of all, I just want to wish you a Merry Christmas! I know nobody cares about my birthday, but I hope they care about Jesus. Now we are done talking about my guy JC, I’ll share the story of how Lockdown put me on the government watchlist. I was just chilling with my Christian buds, when I downloaded this abominable app. At first, I only saw a few vans, but then the helicopters started. I immediately grabbed my favorite stuffed animal and made for the door. I hopped on my trike and skidded out of there. As I pedaled down I4, bumping to Kidzbop 34, a fleet of Toyota Priuses painted with the letters “Save Our Furry Friends, Support PETA” chased after me. I arrived at the airport, dihydrogen monoxide dripping from my forehead, but the security guards quickly escorted me away. I am now writing this sad tale in prison. Please don’t make the same mistake by downloading this app. (Disclaimer: While I do not love this app, none of the things mentioned above are true or are meant to harm anyone. Thanks, and I hope you had a good laugh.)

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NOT a joke review like almost everyone. Not only did it say something was disabled and "test can't be delivered." What does that even mean? Is this a pizza? But it also didn't even let me close the app afterwards. I gave up trying to get the test to start so I tried closing the app. A screen popped up and said I needed a password to exit even though there wasn't one and I couldn't even shut down the iPad so I could close the app. I found a way to hard restart but it took a while to find out how to do that and this app makes a huge deal out of me just wanting to exit the app. Atleast add the functionality of being able to power off the iPad. It works on pc though but my review is based on this app in particular. On pc it makes a huge deal out of me wanting to exit and says your teacher will know don't exit like I should worry about that? I bet my teacher wouldn't even care because I like exiting tests and coming back later and that shouldn't be a big deal.

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A soon as I opened the app a vague chanting sound emitted from my iPad. They slowly got louder and louder until it was all I could feel. All of a sudden was slowly rising into the air. I looked up to see a North Korean misleading carrier ship beaming me up. I was beamed up and strapped to a suspicious table with many devices of torture. Kim Jung Un approached me and started speaking in Siberian. I was then transported to a Russian labor camp where I was worked for 23 hours ma day. I barely managed to escape. All of a sudden the bullets go back in the gun the bullet holes close up in my chest and I am back on the North Korean mussel carrier I detonate a few bombs before I am discovered. I fall down to a North Korean hanger.l I had several bullet wounds from my escape and knew I couldn’t walk. I hijacked a plane and am broadcasting this from an undisclosed area in India. Avoid dowloading this app at all costs. Run while you still can. Please send help. I don’t know how long I have left. PLEASE SEND HELP.

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First of all, I am being hunted. I knew something was wrong the moment I hit install, and my senses didn’t fail me. That was two hours and six minutes ago, and since then, they’ve gotten everyone but me. I wish I could say their deaths were quick, but that would be a lie. John was thrown out the window by that thing, and it ate poor Rachel alive. If I survive this, her screams will haunt me forever. It almost got me too, but I managed to slip away. It scratched my arm with one of it’s claws though, and the wound is already turning black. It must’ve injected some sort of venom, I might need to cut it off. I got one of the fire axes from the hallway, but I don’t think i can do this. But I have to. If I don’t live through this, tell my mother I love her. Oh, and I just need everyone to know this; DO NOT INSTALL LOCKDOWN BROWSER.

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I downloaded this app and soon I began have persistent headaches. I didn’t think it was anything, until I became dizzy all the time, and I would have blurred vision. I kept it from a secret from my mom, but then suddenly I had a seizure one Sunday morning when my mom came to wake me up for church. She rushed me to the doctor and the doctor diagnosed me with brain cancer, and told me I have 1 hour to live before it kills me. I didn’t go to the doctor sooner and it spread. I had other symptoms like pins and needles, vertigo, and personality change. All symptoms of brain cancer, I knew it. So at 8:29 AM, I passed away from brain cancer. At my funereal my mom and dad sobbed like crazy, same with my grandma. I’m writing from the grave to tell you all not to download the app or you will have the same fate as me, after all I am writing from the grave.