Bigfoot Calls

I downloaded this app thinking that it would just be another scammy prank app. Boy was I wrong. This app is the best thing to ever grace the store. It’s so amazing that I can actually feel what it’s like to be a Sasquatch. Every night for 7 years, I have been going into the woods attempting to find a Bigfoot using this app. I continually use the female Bigfoot option hoping I can find someone to fill the painful void in my heart. Human women have completely alienated me from this world. So I have decided to instead search for a Bigfoot girlfriend. So far it hasn’t worked. Maybe I’ll move to a new area with a different forest to try and make my life whole. 10/10 would recommend to a friend.

For thirty years I have lived in the wild forests of the Pacific Northwest. The Sasquatch are private and easy going neighbors, keeping to themselves mostly. They enjoy macaroni crafts and pepperoni pizza. They tend to communicate non-verbally and prefer to gaze into your heart and soul instead of exchanging pleasantries. They only make two real sounds, one of joy and one of freight. These recordings are 100% accurate and amazing! It is like I am back living in a tree deep in the lost country listening to them have a party interrupted by some hipster hikers. I recommend this app to anyone that wants to learn how to identify the calls of the Sasquatch in the wild and discern them from the ravings of drunken hippies.

This app is amazing, it really help me go after big foot. My wife called me crazy but she was just in my way to go after big foot! YEE YEE, I used this app on a speaker trying to hunt down wild big foot. I have found two so far, super good app!

I always spam the human alert and in my car and night at full blast it scares the crap out of my friends at night!!!

I laugh every time I press one of the calls!! Sometimes I use the Human Alert to wake up my kids in the morning! They laugh and so do I!